Meta Report

[Gordy]

Friday, August 31st, 2018

Welcome to the Meta Report! Run by everyone's favorite anonymous reporter, this blog will be about the hottest and not-est of the superpowered world. And with a bunch of exclusive facts and news, I can guarantee that this blog is one of the best sources of information.

Every week or so, I'll highlight a hero and a villain, and some of their most recent actions. If you want to know which heroes are hot, or which villains are vile, these lists are perfect.

So, which hero and villain are worthy of starting the list? 

Hero of the Week: Mr. Fantastic
Now, the amazing elastic man hasn't been that active lately, but who doesn't love the Fantastic Four? Especially after his fight with a red, She-Hulk-like monster in the desert of Nevada. He, along with several other heroes like Wonder Man and Solar, were able to send the beast running. 

But that's not all: the man reportedly found the monster in a nearby town. Instead of continuing their fight though, he was able to talk the monster into leaving peacefully. I heard the Red She-Hulk has turned over a new leaf, so it looks like Mr. Fantastic made the right call.

Villain of the Week: Absorbing Man
You might have seen him in the news recently, robbing a bank. But while bank-robbing isn't anything special these days, taking on multiple heroes at once is. Though I'm not familiar with those redheaded heroes, taking them both on must have been tough.

Hero Rankings

1. Mr. Fantastic

Villain Rankings

1. Absorbing Man

Tune in next week for more spotlights. And if our special sponsorship deal works out, you can expect our highlighted happeners to get rewards or punishments for their actions. Expect some great things from this blog!

[Gordy]

Friday, August 31st, 2018

Welcome back to the Meta Report! Run by everyone's favorite anonymous reporter, this blog will be about the hottest and not-est of the superpowered world. And with a bunch of exclusive facts and news, I can guarantee that this blog is one of the best sources of information.

Every week or so, I'll highlight a hero and a villain, and some of their most recent actions. If you want to know which heroes are hot, or which villains are vile, these lists are perfect.

I know the last blog post is only a couple of hours old, but it looks like the blog's gotten some views! 17, to be exact. Along with two comments! So to celebrate, let's rank-up our ranks.

Hero of the Week: Kid Arachnid
Another up-and-comer hero, and it looks like he's here to stay. The young Spider-Man has been very active in New York: he battled a giant frog at a science fair, battled the Rhino and the Vulture, teamed up heroes old and new, and fought dinosaurs. For his hard work and big presence, he's our Hero of the Week.

Villain of the Week: Taskmaster
A new hero, an old villain. Everyone's favorite version of Skeletor has always been a notable, if quiet figure in the criminal world. One would only have to look at his most recent actions to see: he teamed up with Crossbones to fight dozens of heroes at Madison Square Gardens, he is rumored to be behind the assassination of a famous scientist, and my sources say that he has ties to Hydra. Quite a scary man, no?


Hero Rankings

1. Kid Arachnid
2. Mr. Fantastic

Villain Rankings

1. Taskmaster
2. Absorbing Man

[Gordy]

Friday, September 7th, 2018

Welcome back to the Meta Report! Run by everyone's favorite anonymous reporter, this blog will be about the hottest and not-est of the superpowered world. And with a bunch of exclusive facts and news, I can guarantee that this blog is one of the best sources of information.

Every week or so, I'll highlight a hero and a villain, and some of their most recent actions. If you want to know which heroes are hot, or which villains are vile, these lists are perfect.

Hero of the Week: Silk
Here comes another spider hero. Silk is another new-ish face, but she's been very busy saving the day. From teaming up with Spider-Man to stopping a bank robbery, to fighting Doctor Octopus with the help of the Defenders. And speaking of the Defenders, she might be one of them. Spiders sure do find their way into anything, don't they? 

Villain of the Week: Dire
This guy's pretty new to the scene. And normally, just committing a murder in public wouldn't be enough to brand you a supervillain. But having super speed, teleportation, a flaming sword, and the skills to fight off another powered person? That's how you put the "super" in "supervillain." And if the rumors about him being associated with demons is true, then this newcomer might be a big problem in the future.

Hero Rankings

1. Kid Arachnid
2. Mr. Fantastic
3. Silk

Villain Rankings

1. Taskmaster
2. Absorbing Man
3. Dire

[Gordy]

Welcome back to the Meta Report! Run by everyone's favorite anonymous reporter, this blog will be about the hottest and not-est of the superpowered world. And with a bunch of exclusive facts and news, I can guarantee that this blog is one of the best sources of information.

Every week or so, I'll highlight a hero and a villain, and some of their most recent actions. If you want to know which heroes are hot, or which villains are vile, these lists are perfect.

Hero of the Week: Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell
It looked like Kid Arachnid and Hawkeye were nearly skewered, until a bombastic new heroine arrived on the scene. In addition to stopping the charging Rhino, she has also been reported fighting alongside Kid Arachnid and a child Nova, against a ship full of alien invaders. 

Both names have been heard in use, and both describe her well. The girl's power seems to be similar to that of the X-Men's Boom-Boom: she can generate dangerous and deadly explosions. Rumor has it that she was also involved in stopping the Halloween Zombie Apocalypse 2k18, as her trademark blasts were reported in the area.

Villain of the Week: Lightspeed
Of the Power Pack. I don't know why she's considered a villain, but our newest sponsor said "She knows what she did." So, there you go.

Hero Rankings

1. Kid Arachnid
2. Mr. Fantastic
3. Silk
4. Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell

Villain Rankings

1. Lightspeed
2. Taskmaster
3. Absorbing Man
4. Dire

[Gordy]

Welcome back to the Meta Report!

It's been a while since the last update, huh? Well, that's because some scumbag mutie torched the apartment building next door, so everyone had to evacuate. I had to stay with family and it was this whole THING... But you're not here to hear all about that, so let's get to the heroes!

Hero of the Week: Scarlet Spider

You remember that apartment fire I mentioned? This guy showed up to pull me and family out of the fire! I also heard that they helped to stop the bad guy, along with some other heroes. Good on him!

In addition to that, he also works alongside the Avengers, and could very well be among their numbers. Barring any unforseen scandals, I see him having a bright future ahead of him.

Villain of the Week: Punisher

A bold choice, but one I think is relevant. Tales of his horrifying crusade has echoed through our fair city for years. A man who takes justice into his own hands by gunning people down. Some say he's a hero for getting rid of criminals other, "real" heroes can't. Others say he's a criminal playing Judge, Judy and Executioner. But everybody says that he's incredibly powerful, nigh-unstoppable and impossible to persuade.


Hero Rankings

1. Scarlet Spider
2. Mr. Fantastic
   
3. Kid Arachnid
   
4. Silk
5. Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell

Villain Rankings

1. Lightspeed
2. Punisher
3. Taskmaster
4. Absorbing Man
5. Dire

Note: Many people have pointed out to me how Reed Richards has been helping the city from behind the scenes for years. Even when he's not out in the field, he's still doing his part to help the world. For this reason, Mr. Fantastic has been moved up the list.

[Gordy]

Welcome back to the Meta Report: the blog that has gets triple-digit views every week!

We're halfway through our top 10 list, so let's keep the ball rolling. So today, we'll be doubling up on heroes and villains.

Hero of the Week: Nightcrawler & Redwood
Who doesn't love Nightcrawler? Even people who hate mutants love Nightcrawler. That's because he's one of the good mutants out there, fighting for everyone instead of himself. He gives his people a good name. Because of hard-working mutants like him, I have hope that humans and muties can one day get along.

Not only is he a long-time hero, he is a role model. For this, he's debuting on the list at number 3.

[ ---- ]

Our next hero is another newcomer, but you might recognize him from some fight videos that have gone viral Redwood is a masked chlorokinetic with some affiliation with SHIELD. Despite his strange accent, he has proven himself to be a respectable hero in his own right. From battling giant crabs on a subway, to assisting SHIELD in an arrest, to capturing small-time, would-be thieves, he's done quite a bit of work in a short amount of time.

Villain of the Week: Magneto & Purple Man
Speaking of bad villains, our next villain is Magneto. How many times has he gone after innocent humans while justifying his prejudices? He's a disgusting old man who has spent years terrorizing the human race, and could very well commit genocide if he had the opportunity. And unless you believe those "he's some guy named Xorn!" theories, he very nearly did a couple of years back.

[ ---- ]

Legends speak of the man with purple skin. He's a crime lord with the scary ability to mind control others with pheromones. And yes, he has abused this power to torture, manipulate, kill, and possibly even sexually assault others. 

One of his most famous victims is the hero, Jessica Jones. Formerly known as Jewel, a long-held belief is that he took control of her mind and kept her as his slave for months. No one knows for sure what went down, but it couldn't have been pretty. He truly is a terrifying villain.


Hero Rankings

1. Scarlet Spider
2. Mr. Fantastic
3. Nightcrawler
   
4. Kid Arachnid
5. Silk
6. Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell
7. Redwood

Villain Rankings

1. Magneto
2. Purple Man
3. Lightspeed
4. Punisher
5. Taskmaster
6. Absorbing Man
7. Dire

[Gordy]

Welcome back to the Meta Report: the blog that has an irregular posting schedule.

We're almost done with the top 10.

Hero of the Week: Captain Marvel
Is it any surprise that she'd make the list? Her role in the controversial. superhero civil war a couple years back is still felt today, but she has continued to be an active hero in the community. She's an Avenger, a hero, and, if the rumors are true, raised the Collector's secret base and crushed his nefarious robot.

Her powers are also nothing to sneeze at. Defeating her would be no easy feat: she had amazing strength, speed, durability, projectile energy powers, and the ability to fly. Some say that she's unbeatable, but I personally have my doubts.

Villain of the Week: Titania
Not the most famous villain, sure. And if rumors are true, she's not that much of a villain, either. In the past, she has been a career criminal with ties to the Masters of Evil, Frightful Four and many other villains. But lately, it seems she's been busy doing some less-than-wicked deeds, such as fighting in an exhibition match for charity. Those good deeds will cost her in the rankings, though.

Like the good Captain above, Titania also has super strength and durability. She's said to be the strongest woman on the planet, next to She-Hulk. Because of this, many of her defeats came from her enemies using their brains over their muscles. 

---

Before I list the rankings, I have to amend the list beyond its new additions. It's come to my attention that Scarlet Spider, of the Avengers fame, has had some legal trouble. Something about a murder? Though exonerated by the president, there's still some doubt about his integrity. If I can speak candidly, I think he's a cold-blooded murderer. As such, he has dropped down the list until he can redeem himself in my eyes.


Hero Rankings

1. Mr. Fantastic
   
2. Captain Marvel
3. Nightcrawler
   
4. Kid Arachnid
5. Silk
6. Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell
7. Redwood
8. Scarlet Spider

Villain Rankings

1. Magneto
2. Purple Man
3. Lightspeed
4. Punisher
5. Taskmaster
6. Absorbing Man
7. Dire
8. Titania

[Gordy]

Welcome back to the Meta Report, where Weekly Posts are posted twice in one day.


Hero of the Week: Daredevil
The hero of Hell's Kitchen. Though a "devil" might conjure up a scary image, this hero is anything but scary. He's been the heart of Hell's Kitchen, prowling the neighborhood and protecting people like a guardian angel. He's dealt with arson, murder, crime lords, Mysterio, dozens of big- and small-time villains, even other heroes that have crossed a line or two. Who would have thought that a man in a red demon suit would be such a good guy?

Now, Daredevil's powers aren't too flashy: he supposedly has superhuman hearing and smell, and I wouldn't be surprised to hear that he had the most amazing eyesight on top of that. He's a martial arts master and wields a club to deliver the smack-down on unsuspecting foes. It comes with a grappling hook for easier movement. Eat your heart out, Spider-Man!

Villain of the Week: Carnage
Carnage has been an iconic villain for a while. But what made me pick him was a recent incident we're all too aware of: his attack on a school, in which he mauled and endangered several students, caused a chaotic amount of property damage, and man-handled several heroes at once. It was only through the teamwork of five heroes, that Carnage was able to be taken down. And even then, it was not before he crippled a person.

Not only does he look like a demon, he has the strength, durability and viciousness of one, too. He can also control his body and create tentacles, which are just as dangerous as they are disgusting. Supposedly, he's weak to sonic blasts. But even then, very few people can pull these off before he takes them out of the equation in the most brutal ways imaginable.

Hero Rankings

1. Mr. Fantastic
   
2. Captain Marvel
3. Daredevil
4. Nightcrawler
   
5. Kid Arachnid
6. Silk
7. Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell
8. Redwood
9. Scarlet Spider

Villain Rankings

1. Magneto
2. Carnage
3. Purple Man
4. Lightspeed
5. Punisher
6. Taskmaster
7. Absorbing Man
8. Dire
9. Titania

[Gordy]

Welcome back to the Meta Report, where we finally finish the top 10 list.

There was another fire in New York. This time, it wasn't one of my places. But perhaps the city is caught up in a giant arson conspiracy? Only time or telepathy will tell.

Hero of the Week: Thor
A classic hero, Avenger, and a mythological figure as legendary as the legends about him. Is there anything that needs to be said about this founding member of the Avengers? What about his super strength, or his hammer, Mjolnir? Or maybe I can go on about his beautiful golden hair, without a single tangle or flaw. I could run my hands through it and feel every silky fiber as they glide down those beautiful locks.

Villain of the Week: Rhino
I know you were the one behind my bank being shut down. I was late paying my rent because of you and your actions. Oh, and you also kicked those heroes' butts when they tried to stop you.


Hero Rankings

1. Thor
   
2. Mr. Fantastic
   
3. Captain Marvel
4. Daredevil
5. Nightcrawler
   
6. Kid Arachnid
7. Silk
8. Queen Explosion Murder/Bombshell
9. Redwood
10. Scarlet Spider

Villain Rankings

1. Magneto
2. Carnage
3. Purple Man
4. Lightspeed
5. Punisher
6. Taskmaster
7. Absorbing Man
8. Dire
9. Rhino
10. Titania

Now that we have our top 10, now what? I'm thinking I'll continue updating the list and adding more heroes and villains. Maybe the best heroes and villains will get prizes? Because a certain investor of mine said that rewards might encourage heroes and villains to up the stakes.