Post by Milicondras on Jan 31, 2021 1:08:30 GMT -7
 May 14th 2020 I saw a newspaper today turns out today is my 15th birthday, second year without Jaxson and one year without Addison or Selene. It’s not the first birthday without all of them but still just as lonely. You know I hear adults telling kids my age to appreciate their siblings while they’re around cause one day they may not be there. Still haven’t heard any of them tell them that even if you cherish every waking second with them it won’t lessen a single ounce of the pain when they’re gone. Then again it may be different if it’s your fault they’re all gone. Anyways this year I got a busted lip brow black eye 5 new bruises and this very book that they threw at my head before they ran off with some candy I managed to grab. Can’t say I blame them though they seemed in a bad mood and didn’t take too kindly to me yelling at them when I saw them messing with some other kid. I was pretty stupid and even did a blast like thing from my hand when they went to throw a punch at the other kid and… I sorta.. I think with all the crunching sounds the guys hand’s bones were crushed. Honestly I The kid ended up calling me a freak and splitting while the other guys were busy kicking me after the black eye. Thankfully no broken ribs I guess. I didn’t fight back much after the kid ran and I think they thought I was knocked out when I stopped moving on the ground so hey guess not fighting back is a counter method after all… honestly I was hoping they would have kept going. But after throwing the book they had grabbed off the kid they just left. Guess no beatings to death today. After I cleaned the gashes the best I could with some of the water I had on hand I figured while I wait for the local convenience store to get busy so I can sleep in and get some disinfectant and those weird strip bandages to help the gashes from reopening later that I just start writing. I haven’t really talked to anyone for about a year now so it sorta feels a bit better having something to write in even if its a stupid book. That and now I have something to take notes in, I’ve been writing notes on my arm when I’ve been sneaking into the local high school and chillin in the vents during their classes. Thankfully the science room usually needs to be kept at a lower temperature due to all the chemicals and stuff in there so the vents never get too hot to linger in while I listen to the lesson. Though it does get freezing a lot. The one I normally linger at also gets into mostly space based stuff when I’m around there and I think the teacher is a bit narrow minded towards aliens but the lessons on potential space travel that humans have on Earth is still super cool! Oh and the potential behind negative energy and harnessing the power of wormholes or manipulating them for- Sorry back a group of people were headed my way so I had to hide. Anyway the store is pretty busy now if I go now I may even get a can of well anything if I’m fast. I don’t wanna grab too much more past just one can though, grab too much and it’ll start costing the store noticeable stuff and that could get the workers on duty in serious trouble for losing product. But if it’s like a dollar can of soup or something it should be fine and that should tide me over for a few hours until I can find another store… The group of guys from before sorta looted my backpack while I was down so I don’t really have any more food again.... Okay so there were many reasons why they thought I was out cold when I stopped moving. But there’s no real point in fighting if the kid was gone, he wasn’t wrong. I am a freak and one that has been the cause of a lot of deaths by now. So why fight if there's no one to fight for when it’s just cause more people problems. I’m not exactly worth the effort and those guys got food they probably needed. So the kid got to get away, they got food, and I got a book I suppose. So good birthday. … Happy birthday Jaxson I know your birthday isn’t here yet but I still hope today was good for you. Oh! And the local library still has that King Aurthur book you used to read me! So I’m gonna get it so I can visit you at the graveyard and read it to you this year cause. Cause you can’t read it to me this time. But it’s okay, I didn’t slack on my reading so I can read it to you! Know what I’ll dedicate this book to you. That way it feels like you’re not missing out. I’m sure where ever you are now is way better then here but. Incase you miss it for some weird reason. And also cause. Cause it’s my birthday and Addison always told me I could be selfish on my birthday and I think it’d be nice to pretend you were here this way!... Hope that’s okay. Anyway I’ll write to you later. Love you big brother, Athena OOC:**This entry’s pages can be found around New York market area’s alleyways by a dumpster.** |
 May 25th 2020 So Jaxson turns out if an apex predator of the high school variety sees you as a weak teen they don’t care if you go to their school or not they will just make fun of you in hopes to assert their dominance and cute eyeliner and perfectly bouncy hair. I have been intimidated like a lot but never of, like lilly perfume paired with strawberry lip gloss. I couldn’t tell if the heart beating out of my chest was because of them staring me down, cornering me in the library between Lousmin quantum theory and dark matter for dummies while popping their bubble gum in their face. Like come on this is a section for studying the aspects of space and stuff not the plants gravitational pull variations thus making them want to test my own gravitational pull nor the section about chemical imbalances that make teens feel the need to pose themselves as alphas to new pack members. Honestly they made fair and very descriptive accurate points about my current weight and status of my cleanliness but it was a bit intrusive and for some reason my brain kept thinking this is a family christan library an-... never mind its weird enough thinking about this on my own let alone writing this to my dead older brother. I’d say I wish I could talk to the twins about this but both would likely tell me to do something weird or violent so best I didn’t ask them. I have a little idea on what was going on though based on how Jenny tried to explain how when you get older you start getting weird feelings around others you think are pretty and it's totally normal but she didn’t get too much father cause she and Addison started to debate if 13 was too young to give me ‘the talk’ or something. So I guess the weird feeling was like normal so at least there’s that reassurance. Anyway that book you always told me to check out about the discovery of human space travel and I’m gonna start reading it soon. I hope it goes into different angles that some of those other broad studies and history of that stuff cause I do like to go over old information patches but it could be cool to see more angels of the same study in case it covers possible theories they had in the past and how they changed over time or possibly could prove true now today with our latest information on everything post alien life finding…. I wish you were here to talk about theories still… Miss you, Athena OOC:**This journal entry can be found crumpled in a now recently closed and run down dinner under some booth seats** |
April 5th 2020 Heroes are praised but the moment most hear they’re power come from mutant genes over anything else they become hated…. I don’t get it. Athena OOC:**The top half is missing to this entry** **This strip of paper can be found likely drifting around through the air somewhere** |
 April 15th 2020 Someone asked my name today and I told them it was Morgan Fay. I needed a name outside of my own to use so I used Morgan’s. I always have felt more in tune with science fiction and science based things over history but I couldn’t stop thinking of the old King Arthur book you used to read me. Honestly I think you read it to me to inspire me about the idea of goodness and good actions and deeds over evil will always be the best answer. But honestly I always enjoyed the story for another reason. I always felt like I could relate far more to Morgan Le Fay in that story. As much as I love you I totally could understand who she must have felt having a brother who everyone saw as perfect, he was gifted so much and looked like a king among peasants, how everyone around her was seen as heroes in their own rights and praised. While all she does is portrayed as evil and selfish. I get being the evil half sister who for so long only wanted to be deemed strong and important and my own strengths and power as something good not evil. Even if her stuff was evil or not I still can relate to it. Her drive to keep trying and fighting and bettering herself to reach her goals I’m not too sure how well I am there but honestly to me is something to hope to be more like one day. To see your weaknesses and faults and either use or work around them all to reach your goal and become stronger or use out right skills and intelligence to overcome what your power can not. So I don’t know how long I’ll use the name but at least for now I wish to just be Morgan Fay. Maybe trying to be more like Morgan Le Fay will help me more. Morgan OOC:**This entry is placed neatly on a desk in an abandoned building** |
