Post by Jaymi on Mar 14, 2018 14:09:39 GMT -7
Star-Lord: You awake yet, gatherer? God, first question. What's your krutacking name?
Gatherer: I'm not telling you anything.
Star-Lord: We could play it that way. Or I could use my element guns and play shockey with you until I find whatever norkhole your gnords are hiding in?
Gatherer: You wouldn't dare hurt an innocent man.
Star-Lord: I wouldn't! Lucky for me, you're not innocent.
Gatherer: But the Collector is an innocent man. A great man. He's a hero to the universe.
Gatherer: I wouldn't betray him for myself.
Star-Lord: He just tried to kill us, had one of you guys blow your head off, and oh yeah, he keeps sentient creatures in captivity. Besides, we're not planning on hurting him. Honest.
Gatherer: You're too small-minded to see his grand design. And I'm not going to help you ruin it. So you can take your flea-bitten crew and head back to the krutaking trash planets of Grazelle.
Gatherer: Do what you want. I'm not telling you anything!
Star-Lord: How about a deal then? You tell me what I want to know and I don't tell the Collector next time how much you squealed?
Gatherer: How about this: I don't tell you anything, and I don't betray my boss?
Gatherer: *spits*
Star-Lord: Cool, cool. Wonder how he'll respond when we tell him you told us everything anyways? He doesn't seem like a very patient man.
Gatherer: I'll be dead by then, I'm sure.
Gatherer: And how will you find the Collector without me?
Star-Lord: Finding the Collector is easy. He's not exactly the most flarkin' subtle person in the galaxy. That's not what I want from you.
Gatherer: Then what DO you want from me?
Star-Lord: Let's start with your name.
Gatherer: I'm a Gatherer.
Star-Lord: Yep. But that's dumb to call someone. I guess I could call you Gath...
Gatherer: Call me whatever you want. But as a Gatherer, I only answer to the Collector.
Star-Lord: Alright then, Gath. See, that's really only a little better... Antarctic Museum. Real thing or just him being a twit?
Gatherer: Why should I tell you anything? You can go to the Antarctic and see for yourself.
Star-Lord: I can. And I will. But I'm trying to save some time and make progress while Rocky fixes up the Milano. If I have to go there to find out, I'm going to be real annoyed and might just drop a thermobomb on the base instead of going inside.
Gatherer: You can't!
Gatherer: I'll say this: the Collector isn't in the Antarctic Museum. He's not even on this planet anymore.
Gatherer: You can't destroy the Museum. It houses a monster that shouldn't ever be let out.
Star-Lord: Cool. So Antarctic Museum is real and he's not there. First target. Thanks.
Gatherer: No! Don't you know what's there?
Star-Lord: And what's that?
Gatherer: The Collector's Museums aren't just to house his collection. Sometimes, they're prisons for things too dangerous for this universe.
Gatherer: I believe you would know the species held in there, a member of the Klyntar species.
Star-Lord: Only in a general sense. A few Earthers wear them around. They're not nice guys, but they don't seem so bad that me wrecking your boss' place isn't worth it.
Gatherer: This one is different. If you're familiar with the Genocide of the Salvidaran II?
Gatherer: This Klyntar is responsible for the deaths of millions of Salvidarans.
Star-Lord: Okay, is there like... a map to the thing in the museum?
Gatherer: I'm not telling you anything! Knowing you Guardians, you'll probably let it go and kill everyone on Earth.
Gatherer: And after that thing finishes with Earth, it'll probably head to Salvidaran Prime and finish off the rest of the creatures you're trying to save.
Star-Lord: Which is WHY you're going to tell me. Because otherwise I don't trust you and I just blow the museum up. Tell me where to find it and I'll put an end to it.
Gatherer: So you're going to let millions die, just to get one Salvidaran?
Gatherer: I'm calling your bluff, Star-Lord.
Star-Lord: I'm willing to let millions die to get payback on the Collector.
Gatherer: Fine. Go ahead. When the human race is on the brink of extinction, the humans will be easier to collect.
Star-Lord: The Earthers have held back Galactus, fight Klyntars on a daily basis, and wrecked Thanos. I'm not so worried about them.
Gatherer: Then if they're not in danger, I have nothing to fear.
Star-Lord: Cool! Hey, Rocket, prepare a thermobomb! Extra thermo!
Gatherer: Wait!
Star-Lord: Hmm?
Gatherer: You can kill me, but I'll never tell you which moon the Collector is on.
Star-Lord: I'm not going to kill you, man! Like I said, I'll bring you with us, sneak in to wherever we find, and make sure the Collector knows you led us straight to him.
Gatherer: If the Collector thinks I betrayed him, I'll be dead... But if I'll be dead before I spill anything to you, anyway.
Star-Lord: Yeah, but telling me what you know gives you time. Heck, I'll even let you go. You can run off and warn him.
Gatherer: If you give me back my communicator, I can ask the Collector if he's willing to speak?
Star-Lord: Yeah, no. Last time someone got a call from him, he blew his head off. And as funny as that would be to watch a second time?
Gatherer: Fine, fine. Then I suppose I can tell you, if you do me a favor?
Star-Lord: If you say something rude next, I'm going to be really cross with you, Gath.
Gatherer: *Spits at his face.* I was just going to ask you to clean your face.
Star-Lord: Alright, you just got nominated to be that Klyntar's new host.
Gatherer: But it'll destroy me!
Gatherer: And then I'll go after the Collector...
Gatherer: If you promise me you won't go to the Antarctic Museum, I'll give you a hint as to the Collector's whereabouts. But you must also let me go, and not tell the Collector.
Star-Lord: Oooh, new idea. I like this host option. I bet it would totally come along for a ride with us to say hi to the Collector. And using you is great. It'd have all your memories...
Star-Lord: I bet he'd tell us where to drive him too. What do you think?
Gatherer: Hmm...
Gatherer: Alright, alright!
Gatherer: The Collector has a rest stop on the Earth's moon.
Star-Lord: Ugh, that's stupid close. Alright, I can work with that. And where's the Klyntar? I'm not letting it stay on this planet where it can murderize millions of innocents.
Gatherer: Don't you touch it. If you let it out, it will overwhelm your inferior brains and escape.
Gatherer: The Collector is already protecting this planet by keeping it hidden.
Star-Lord: He's got it ON the planet. It shouldn't be on Earth at all, you dipstick! I'm taking it off world, maybe throwing it into a sun. Bounty hunters nab those things often enough. We can contain it long enough to let it see the inside of a star.
Gatherer: If you want to grab it, you'll have to do it without me. Good luck finding it, Star-Lord. And by the time you even reach the museum, the Collector would be long gone. And I don't know where his next destination is.
Gatherer: He'll be on the moon for no more than three days. So unless you have people helping you, the Guardians don't have enough manpower to get the Klynar AND the master.
Star-Lord: I told you. We're not after him. Three days? We can do that. Plus if he's that close, backtracking him with your communicator will be enough to get a lock on the ship. We can follow him any where. You've been... some kind of help. We'll let you go before we leave the planet. Have a good day, Gath.
Gatherer: Damn.... I can't wait to see this blow up in your face.
Gatherer: I'm not telling you anything.
Star-Lord: We could play it that way. Or I could use my element guns and play shockey with you until I find whatever norkhole your gnords are hiding in?
Gatherer: You wouldn't dare hurt an innocent man.
Star-Lord: I wouldn't! Lucky for me, you're not innocent.
Gatherer: But the Collector is an innocent man. A great man. He's a hero to the universe.
Gatherer: I wouldn't betray him for myself.
Star-Lord: He just tried to kill us, had one of you guys blow your head off, and oh yeah, he keeps sentient creatures in captivity. Besides, we're not planning on hurting him. Honest.
Gatherer: You're too small-minded to see his grand design. And I'm not going to help you ruin it. So you can take your flea-bitten crew and head back to the krutaking trash planets of Grazelle.
Gatherer: Do what you want. I'm not telling you anything!
Star-Lord: How about a deal then? You tell me what I want to know and I don't tell the Collector next time how much you squealed?
Gatherer: How about this: I don't tell you anything, and I don't betray my boss?
Gatherer: *spits*
Star-Lord: Cool, cool. Wonder how he'll respond when we tell him you told us everything anyways? He doesn't seem like a very patient man.
Gatherer: I'll be dead by then, I'm sure.
Gatherer: And how will you find the Collector without me?
Star-Lord: Finding the Collector is easy. He's not exactly the most flarkin' subtle person in the galaxy. That's not what I want from you.
Gatherer: Then what DO you want from me?
Star-Lord: Let's start with your name.
Gatherer: I'm a Gatherer.
Star-Lord: Yep. But that's dumb to call someone. I guess I could call you Gath...
Gatherer: Call me whatever you want. But as a Gatherer, I only answer to the Collector.
Star-Lord: Alright then, Gath. See, that's really only a little better... Antarctic Museum. Real thing or just him being a twit?
Gatherer: Why should I tell you anything? You can go to the Antarctic and see for yourself.
Star-Lord: I can. And I will. But I'm trying to save some time and make progress while Rocky fixes up the Milano. If I have to go there to find out, I'm going to be real annoyed and might just drop a thermobomb on the base instead of going inside.
Gatherer: You can't!
Gatherer: I'll say this: the Collector isn't in the Antarctic Museum. He's not even on this planet anymore.
Gatherer: You can't destroy the Museum. It houses a monster that shouldn't ever be let out.
Star-Lord: Cool. So Antarctic Museum is real and he's not there. First target. Thanks.
Gatherer: No! Don't you know what's there?
Star-Lord: And what's that?
Gatherer: The Collector's Museums aren't just to house his collection. Sometimes, they're prisons for things too dangerous for this universe.
Gatherer: I believe you would know the species held in there, a member of the Klyntar species.
Star-Lord: Only in a general sense. A few Earthers wear them around. They're not nice guys, but they don't seem so bad that me wrecking your boss' place isn't worth it.
Gatherer: This one is different. If you're familiar with the Genocide of the Salvidaran II?
Gatherer: This Klyntar is responsible for the deaths of millions of Salvidarans.
Star-Lord: Okay, is there like... a map to the thing in the museum?
Gatherer: I'm not telling you anything! Knowing you Guardians, you'll probably let it go and kill everyone on Earth.
Gatherer: And after that thing finishes with Earth, it'll probably head to Salvidaran Prime and finish off the rest of the creatures you're trying to save.
Star-Lord: Which is WHY you're going to tell me. Because otherwise I don't trust you and I just blow the museum up. Tell me where to find it and I'll put an end to it.
Gatherer: So you're going to let millions die, just to get one Salvidaran?
Gatherer: I'm calling your bluff, Star-Lord.
Star-Lord: I'm willing to let millions die to get payback on the Collector.
Gatherer: Fine. Go ahead. When the human race is on the brink of extinction, the humans will be easier to collect.
Star-Lord: The Earthers have held back Galactus, fight Klyntars on a daily basis, and wrecked Thanos. I'm not so worried about them.
Gatherer: Then if they're not in danger, I have nothing to fear.
Star-Lord: Cool! Hey, Rocket, prepare a thermobomb! Extra thermo!
Gatherer: Wait!
Star-Lord: Hmm?
Gatherer: You can kill me, but I'll never tell you which moon the Collector is on.
Star-Lord: I'm not going to kill you, man! Like I said, I'll bring you with us, sneak in to wherever we find, and make sure the Collector knows you led us straight to him.
Gatherer: If the Collector thinks I betrayed him, I'll be dead... But if I'll be dead before I spill anything to you, anyway.
Star-Lord: Yeah, but telling me what you know gives you time. Heck, I'll even let you go. You can run off and warn him.
Gatherer: If you give me back my communicator, I can ask the Collector if he's willing to speak?
Star-Lord: Yeah, no. Last time someone got a call from him, he blew his head off. And as funny as that would be to watch a second time?
Gatherer: Fine, fine. Then I suppose I can tell you, if you do me a favor?
Star-Lord: If you say something rude next, I'm going to be really cross with you, Gath.
Gatherer: *Spits at his face.* I was just going to ask you to clean your face.
Star-Lord: Alright, you just got nominated to be that Klyntar's new host.
Gatherer: But it'll destroy me!
Gatherer: And then I'll go after the Collector...
Gatherer: If you promise me you won't go to the Antarctic Museum, I'll give you a hint as to the Collector's whereabouts. But you must also let me go, and not tell the Collector.
Star-Lord: Oooh, new idea. I like this host option. I bet it would totally come along for a ride with us to say hi to the Collector. And using you is great. It'd have all your memories...
Star-Lord: I bet he'd tell us where to drive him too. What do you think?
Gatherer: Hmm...
Gatherer: Alright, alright!
Gatherer: The Collector has a rest stop on the Earth's moon.
Star-Lord: Ugh, that's stupid close. Alright, I can work with that. And where's the Klyntar? I'm not letting it stay on this planet where it can murderize millions of innocents.
Gatherer: Don't you touch it. If you let it out, it will overwhelm your inferior brains and escape.
Gatherer: The Collector is already protecting this planet by keeping it hidden.
Star-Lord: He's got it ON the planet. It shouldn't be on Earth at all, you dipstick! I'm taking it off world, maybe throwing it into a sun. Bounty hunters nab those things often enough. We can contain it long enough to let it see the inside of a star.
Gatherer: If you want to grab it, you'll have to do it without me. Good luck finding it, Star-Lord. And by the time you even reach the museum, the Collector would be long gone. And I don't know where his next destination is.
Gatherer: He'll be on the moon for no more than three days. So unless you have people helping you, the Guardians don't have enough manpower to get the Klynar AND the master.
Star-Lord: I told you. We're not after him. Three days? We can do that. Plus if he's that close, backtracking him with your communicator will be enough to get a lock on the ship. We can follow him any where. You've been... some kind of help. We'll let you go before we leave the planet. Have a good day, Gath.
Gatherer: Damn.... I can't wait to see this blow up in your face.